Where's your fanny?

So I saw a guy wearing a fanny pack today and it got me thinking. First I was thinking that if you are wearing a fanny pack you are definitely a local. As a tourist it would be a huge target, but as a local it's almost a "don't even try anything" sign. Then I started thinking about the fanny pack itself. As far as I know, your 'fanny' is somewhere around your ass region. However, the fanny pack is not actually worn around this area. Instead, it's more of a 'stomach pack', or in an effort to use as silly a word as 'fanny', perhaps you could call it a 'tummy pack'. Regardless, I demand that people either start wearing their fanny packs in the right place or we rename the thing completely.